Slightly odd on the bike path.

A man running, pushing his bike,
only holding onto the
bike by the seat.
He stops, gets on the
bike and
pedals on his way.

2 chicks

I pass these two frequently,
we are going in opposite
direction, they are
walking so fast that if I am not
far enough along they will
reach the end of the path
and come back and lap me.
On top of that they are always
talking non stop, one always
filling in any pauses of
the other.

It is

July is the January
of the summer.

From here on out.

I will greet each day
with the words
"I am a lucky man."

Roundhouse Kick

I man passed me on a bike
with a stencil of
Chuck Norris
on the back of his tee shirt.
I imagined underneath
was written
"tears can cure cancer.....
unfortunately he never cries."

Four Dogs

German Shorthaired Pointer
between puppy and adult
springing straight up
from all 4 paws,

Tall, lank and handsome
black, brown with a white
blaze and intelligent eyes.

Chocolate Labrador being
called back in by the
name of Cocoa.

Small furry and brown
with a feathered tail
that curled up over
his back.

Throw down on the bike path.

Chattering Squirrel: "You look absurd with no fur!"
Walking Biped: "Drop the tail, get up on your
hind legs and do some work!"

Summer Solstice

Autumn has its extravagant colors,
Winter its austere beauty,
Spring its explosion of fauna and flora,
However Summer does the
heavy lifting,
providing life with full bellies,
and a chance to read at the beach.

Rick's dream

"You and I were selected for a space mission. After rigorous training and testing we were sent into space aboard the brown couch from my living room. We did experiments and spacewalks, although we were wearing normal clothes and not space suits. Any time we left the couch we needed to bring enough stuff with us that we could throw/jettison to move us around. I think we got pretty close to the sun. It gets a little fuzzy after that."

"sweet jesus, all these years I have been relying on spitting to get back to the couch!"

Photsynthicly challenged.

The rain brings
the green canopy leaning
over me as if to say
"You poor boy."

Dirty fingernails

Make me smile
in my hermetically
sealed workplace.

Why is now any different?

"Do you mind if I am a pain in the ass?"

Hey Slug

What is so attractive
about the damp asphalt?
There is plenty of wet dirt,
grass and plants
off to the side
where you emerge from.
Is it the lure of
the open road in scale
to our path to the stars?

Overheard Cell Phone Snippet

In the lobby of
Lexington Corporate Center
Building 1.
"It's not you Jack..It's not you Jack...
I am not trying to bust your nuts."

9 Wires

On a telephone pole
outside my bedroom
window,
some black,
some gray,
one orange
and there is someone
who knows which
each does
and
goes.

One small problem

From: Saggy McCratchet
Sent: Wed 5/12/2010 2:49 PM
To: Oswald SteeringWood
Subject: One small problem

There is just one small problem with my Subaru...its an 02 Malibu. Is
there a TSB for this?
Thanks
*********************************************
From: Oswald SteeringWood
Sent: Wed 5/12/2010 3:56 PM
To: Saggy McCratchet
Subject: One small problem
Sir,

I regret to inform you that there is a recall on your vehicle's turbo encabulator. Please bring it in for service immediately so we can replace the encabulator with the new revision. As a part of this service we will also check the dual calf-skin bi-valve exuders at no extra charge.

In the meantime, to help cope with your Subaru/Malibu, or Subalibu, I recommend a continuous regiment of anti-depressants and Metamucil.

I hope this helps.

Best,
Oswald SteeringWood

Black Squirrel

Cheer up,
It's not like you
have to carry a
fat sleeping
dwarf through
Mirkwood.

Weather

Jez: "Rain Wednesday,
Sun Thursday,
Rain both Friday and Saturday,
yuck."
Me: "Rain is good for the grass."
Jez: "Rain is good for us too."

Double Yella

New stripes on
Springs Road this
morning at 2:30.
Still no passing.

What are you going to do?

We are going to walk every day.
We are going to the gym.
We are going to continue taking yoga.
We are going to the beach for a picnic.
We are going to travel.
We are not going to be stuck
all day in front of the TV.

Dead Right of Way

The bicyclist entered
the cross walk expecting
the car to stop
(which it should)
and had to scream stop
as the car blew his
horn and swerved around her.

Really

To the guy cacking
for 20 minutes on
his cell phone while
walking behind me
on the bike path,
I am glad your mom has
kicked her drug
habit.

Color barrage

Blond women,
Wearing a peach shirt,
Blowing a pink gum bubble,
Walking a white dog,
on a red leash.

What a dork

"Why do you want to be a census taker?"
"Well, I have been a fan of the constitution
for a long time."

Show Offs

Do the conifers mind
the deciduous
shameless display
this time of year?
Do they mutter under
their breath
"You weren't looking
so good in February"

Women weeping on Loomis Street.

I asked if she was OK
and she said no.
I asked what the problem
was and after a long pause
she answered
"What would you do if your mother
died and your father abandoned
you in a group home?"
I tried to offer up positive
answers and options
but inside
I knew I would
probably be weeping
in the rain.

All nine holes.

Reporting in just
fine today. All doing
their jobs on
time and within
budget.

Bedford, hang on to your socks

Hydrant flushing tonight
between 8 and midnight.
Don't freak out
at the rusty water
in the toilet.

Cube mates ism's

"Mr. Happy...he's happy"
"How big do you think my teapot is?"
On seeing a shirt with an American Eagle on it -
"Is that a beer shirt?"
"Most people put data at the bottom of the pile,
not me, I put it at the top
right underneath reality."

Pretence

"I like that guy, he's nice."
"He is only pretending to be nice."
"Damn it, I guess I will have to pretend to
like him."

Sweet and the bitter

A beautiful spring Sunday
with family laughing and
smiling. A delightful saunter
walk in the cemetery
revisiting family that has
gone before us.
However to return home
to reunite with a loved one
stalked by a monster
who blows with the
inexorable north wind
of the bitterest winter day
and mocks us. How can we lift
ourselves to help?

Bike path graffiti

Appended to an existing
STOP sign is
"Pelosi"
in a horizontal white
strip marking the
crosswalk is
"Ted Kennedy was a pork
barrel spending pig"

Back is hurting.

R. "Hon, did you punch me in the back?"

M. "No, but I wish I did."

Stayin round here

Jez:"I'll be stayin round
here today. I am just going for some
coffee and cigarettes."
pause
Jez:"I am taking antibiotics
and they are real tuff."
I:"Hope your feeling better"
Jez:"Thanks"
and he continues on his way.

Work

Someone set a
sea anchor on
this day going by.

Idus Martias.

The wind and rain blew
all night.
I woke to a cold shower
due to a flooded basement.
Of the three streams
the Elm won the prize
for flooding a parking lot,
leaving the Kiln and Shawsheen
to bother trees and
brush.

PHHHBBBBBTTTTTTT!

hehe
An email was received
at work from our corporate
overlords titled.

UNCONVENTIONAL GAS
A Game Changer?

Sounds like a bad thing.

T. "Nice that spring has arrived"
R. "I think of it a nice late winter day
that promises a wonderful spring"
T. "Thanks for out positiving me"

Late Winter Day

At 50 degrees
my sole proprietorship
of the
bike path
is rescinded.

While the last of
the man made snow
berms shrink and
take on a coat of
dirt and mud
as they slowly bleed
out across the cement.

H. P. Lovecraft

"The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents. We live on a placid island of ignorance in the midst of black seas of infinity, and it was not meant that we should voyage far. The sciences, each straining in its own direction, have hitherto harmed us little; but some day the piecing together of dissociated knowledge will open up such terrifying vistas of reality, and of our frightful position therein, that we shall either go mad from the revelation or flee from the deadly light into the peace and safety of a new dark age."

Usually

Removing my clothes
in the presence of
a young women is
not such a bad thing.
Although it is a bit
tempered when they
say "You do have a lot
of moles"
and
"I didn't recognize my
father when he shaved
his beard off"

Corporate cacking on a cold rainy day.

The gracious and
unexpected gift
of scrumptious soup,
while it won't grow
back an arm,
it will grow back
a smile.

Snowy morning

She passed me,
with a cheerful "How you doing",
running in the opposite direction
when I heard the clang
of something hitting the
metal stanchions guarding
the bike path from motor
vehicles.
I looked around and she was on her
knees, on the ice patch that I had just
shuffled over,
leaning against the
stanchion with one hand.
She got up and walked then
ran back in the direction she had come.
Passing me again, saying
"That wasn't fun" to my inquiry.

Intersession

A whole plane
load of people were
delayed 24 hours so
I did not have to drive
in the snow.
Thank you jeebus!

Lizard brain relieved

The resister stack
was replaced with
skill and patience
releasing the fan speeds
one through three
from their premature
hiatus.
However, here is the
surprise. I felt
physically better as if
a low grade headache
had been banished.
Thanks UNDRDG.

Overheard at work

M. "Good Morning"
J. "Whats good about it?"
M. "Its payday"
J. "Means I got to pay my bills"
M."Its Friday"
J. "Tax season, I have to work on that this weekend"

Soon after

The Kodiak rose
from hibernation with
the stink of cow dreams
clinging to his nose.
A hungry rumble
shook the cubicles,
the corporate goat herd
tensed,
prepared to flee.

Bitch and moan

Like a lumbering bovine
I trudge into a workplace
cubicle to have a corporations
milking machine attached
to my mental teats.
I have drank so much cool aid
shackles are not even needed
to keep me there. Society
says this is good and provides
anesthetic to mask the surrender
of my ferocity.

half inch snow on black ice

The bike tire tracks told
the tale of treacherous
black ice. The fall all
to evident in the fresh snow
and someone,
perhaps the bicyclist,
wryly commented by
writing the word "OOPS"
in the snow.

Ground Hog Day Instant Message

[11:23] RW82: any word from phil?

[11:24] rw401: Its the middle of winter......there has to be 6 more weeks of winter or we are going to have to move the earth closer to the sun to speed up its revolution!!!

[11:26] RW82: you don't need to convince me, but punxatawny phil says to hell with copernican theory. GO PTOLEMY!

Jacket hood

The cold this morning
had me put up the hood
on my jacket.
This caused me to turn my
torso side to side
when checking traffic to
cross the street,
swaying to and fro
as if Dr. Frankenstein
had over tightened
my neck bolts.

Grock

I watched a squirrel
traverse an area of scrub
woods that had flooded
with about 6 inches of water.
She worked real hard
to avoid being in that water,
where I stood in the
slushy perimeter.
She would be head down
on one tree trunk and
leap horizontally to another
trunk.
After a few minutes
I clomped on my way.

Forty Degree Day in January

Tree litter
branches,twigs,cones and leaves.

Two hornets/wasp nests knocked
to the ground,
between football and
basketball size.

Cathode Ray Tube TV
on its face.

Blue recycle bin
on its side.

A backpack loaded up
with delicious curry.

Served by the Mallards

They taunted me to
join them in Elm brook
where they paddled up
stream between icy
banks knowing full well
it would be to my doom.

Morning on the bike path in winter, January 2010.

Maybe saying it here will keep me out of trouble.

To a pregnant woman
"Stay on your feet and this won't happen again."
To a boy receiving the sacrament of first confession
"If you confess it, its like it never happened."
To a republican
"Bite me."

Not as fast as a croe

I walk pretty sloe
more soe in the snoe
I still get where I goe.

Some things resonate

Heard on
the radio last
night.

"We die three times:
One when our body dies.
Two when our body is buried.
Three when the last person speaks
our name."

Past Glories.

A stiff legged
rheumy eyed
old dog glares
at me from his driveway,
leash just for looks,
twisting head to tell me
that few years ago
it was a different story.
The woman leans
over and gently murmurs
words of past glory,
scratching the dog
behind the ears.

Things I think about

I have no idea how I
go to sleep.
I know how I get ready
to go to sleep however
the actual handshake is
a mystery to me.
Perhaps I am thinking
of it backwards.
I have no idea how I
go to wake.

Bike path panhandler

Amidst the crunch of snow,
Jez (or Bob, it's a little confusing)
says
"We have known each other for a
long time.
Its my birthday this weekend"
I interrupt with a Happy Birthday
wish, trying to derail the
coming train.
He continues "And I would like to
get a cup of coffee...."
The well worn transaction
(although the birthday info
is new) nearly complete.
"I am not going to give you any money."
I say. He looks to my face,
pauses,
and turns and walks away.

I deserve it

Another tomato,
cucumber,
pesto,
swiss cheese,
on toast sandwich.
Washed down with a
kale,
carrot,
banana,
pear,
yogurt,
frozen strawberry
smoothie.

Getting up early

Set the programmable
coffee pot to
six thirty
and it dutifully
summons me to
a half hour of
watching the dawn
(a death valley lesson)
and listening to NPR
from my bed.

Not everything is between the ears.

"Mary is a brilliant scientist who is, for whatever reason, forced to investigate the world from a black and white room via a black and white television monitor. She specializes in the neurophysiology of vision and acquires, let us suppose, all the physical information there is to obtain about what goes on when we see ripe tomatoes, or the sky, and use terms like ‘red’, ‘blue’, and so on. She discovers, for example, just which wavelength combinations from the sky stimulate the retina, and exactly how this produces via the central nervous system the contraction of the vocal cords and expulsion of air from the lungs that results in the uttering of the sentence ‘The sky is blue’. [...] What will happen when Mary is released from her black and white room or is given a color television monitor? Will she learn anything or not? "

You should have one.

What's your
zombie
contingency plan?

Mine is to find
one co-worker
I can out run.

That's all I have
for the short term.

Moirae

My Mom would have been
77 today.
I am now the age Mom
was when she died.
The mortal coil continues
to unwind.

I wish I had words

To describe a life
altering vacation.
I'll be working on it.
In the mean time I
will wander the dream
with a grin
on my face.

Pixie so owns that sarcasm badge

Pigtailed ingenue manning
the table at the exit of
Stop and Shop.
"Would you like to buy some girl scout cookies?"
she piped at me.
"No Thank You" I replied.
To my back she shot
"Thank You for supporting
girl scouts of America
anyway"

Good work day

When my lunch
sandwich is saved till
noon.

Sisyphus

One of the spirits returned,
which ever was the most seductive,
and abandoned him back to
the way Scrooge had been.
This was the worst because
Scrooge now knew what he
was missing.
There were no spirits to redeem him,
just Scrooge to push that boulder
up the mountain
for many years after.

Nothing moves the auction along...

Like some 8th grade eye candy.

Sometimes, just like this.

We had said good bye
and exchanged hugs.
I was stopped at the door with
a question
and then he said
"Wait a sec, give me
another hug".

Golden silence

Stretched between us,
holding us gently in the arms
of quiet harmony
only to be broken at
the very end
with the remonstration
"Its been nice talking to you"

On NPR Morning Edition

Pigs are a member of the
order Artiodactyla
(....pause....)
Even-toed ungulate
(...pause...)
Go look it up.

It was a joke...

If protested from my lips
means its already
to late and I am
screwed.

Robins freaking out.

I could hear them through
the plate glass of Suite111
at the Lexington Corporate Center.
About 5 minutes later a
Red Tail hawk makes
a double pass through the
court yard. Looked like
he went away empty clawed.

Only on WGBH

Would you hear a host
describe a piece of music
that had just been played
as
"The musicians had the audience
eating out of their hands
with that toe tapper
from the 16th century"

Unusual sightings on or around Springs Road

1) I have seen twice now an old man walking backwards (butt forward) up the road.

2) A teenager has something hidden behind stone wall across the street. I have seen him twice stand stone still until there are no cars and then he leaps into the woods. Once I saw him place a clear container of a medium brown liquid behind the wall.

3) There is a guy across the street from me who has covered, I mean hundreds, of bumper stickers on his white Taurus. I can not read them because he parks way up in his driveway. Last night when leaving Stop and Shop at around 8:30pm, way out in the empty parking lot, the car was parked and he was seated on the cement applying another bumper sticker.

Fire Alarm Testing

Here at the Lexington Corporate Center
is anything
really burnt
during the test?

Christmas

The supply closet at work
is a wonderland of
practical gifts.
Paper,
Pencils,
Pens,
Post it Notes,
and one big
honking printer/copier
for those who have been
very good this year.

Stand back, I am a professional.

His deft DBA knowledge
brought out
a girlish laugh
when answering
her question
about sql server.

Sandal shots

The staccato snaps
of her sandals
as she walked
down the hall
brought relief
when not entering
my cube.

Fuckin heat shields.

Header.
Manifold.
Up pipe.
Twin scroll turbo.
Down pipe.
Center pipe.
Mufflers.
Intercooler.
Flash the ECU.
Grin like a wild man!

Robots vs People in space.

R. says:
I can think of one thing people can do in space that robots can't.

M. says:
Was this thing in a james bond movie?

R. says:
That or a James Kirk episode on Start Trek.

M. says:
So robots can't be really bad actors? That's it?

Can you hear me now?

Discussion between two co-workers:

J. said "Your not listening to me."
M. replied "Well then your not listening to me"
J. said "I have told you three times now"

ITEM

I have found that
melding the sliver
of old bar with
the new bar
is very easy with
Dial soap.

WTF

When a woman refers
to herself as
"I don't consider myself a feminist by any means"
what exactly does that mean?
"I'll accept less pay for the same job?"
"I'll accept not being able to vote?"
"I'll let other people tell me how to dress?"
"I'll relinquish control of my body?"
or
"I'll accept people telling me who to demonize?"

Yum Sunday 9/13/2009

Coffee,
Blueberry and Lemon Muffin,
Salt and Vinegar chips (WISE brand),
Roadside wild tart grapes,
that grow like kudzu,
and are served like Communion,
carrots in the rice,
garlic in the beans,
goat cheese and almonds
on the spinach.

Clay I'm not.

For ages,
with a speed slower
than the most gentle snow,
I sank to the bottom
of the tea colored
Acoaxet pond,
to hold the tethers
of lily pads,
whispered to by the rushes,
and
to be gratefully disturbed
by a boy and his dog.

Dog test.

Flat on his back
stomach being scratched
eyes closed in bliss.

Lets do a test.
I'll keep scratching
and you quietly get up
and walk away.

Eyes open and
neck twists to follow
until out of site
and then a quick glance at
me and up he gets
and saunters off to make
sure everything is under
control.

RickWood82 (9:39:46 AM): how ya doin?

richardwood401 (9:40:21 AM): brb

richardwood401 (9:56:34 AM): dandy! how was your suit shopping?

RickWood82 (9:56:52 AM): good... we were there until the mall closed

richardwood401 (9:58:09 AM): boy, talk about 2 opposing ideas in one sentence!

Bad milk

Make a nice big cup
of coffee in the morning
and when adding the milk
seeing that
it has gone bad.

RickWood82 (2:55:38 PM): what made you think of that?

richardwood401 (2:57:24 PM): I don't know, maybe a neutrino impinged on a synapse which knocked loose an electron that fell in my lap.

Feedback Loop

There has to be a way
to collapse chaos
to a
vector
without having to
introduce a gravitational
field emanating from
a biological mass.

Glad to get to work

Leave home in
morning without a cup
of coffee and make a beeline
for the coffee room.

Sun Glass Dance

Their wedding will have everything
money can buy
but money can't buy
the sun glass dance.

What I did at the top of the water fall

I attempted murder by
squeezing the heart
into the throat of a keen observer.

I put scales on the eyes of a gaggle
of brown shirted teenage lemmings.

I gathered my arms around a
squirming wild bikini.

I was Five-Oed by a
hag on a cell phone.

How to prepare for afternoon staff meeting?

5.5 ounces of espresso,
one envelope nestles hot
chocolate mix!

Fathers day 2009

The bounce of the summer solstice
sent me into the world to
experience the trust and love of
my sons, and the gentle, patient kindness
of my Dad, the pain of a family
member's relationship gone awry.

This is how the world ends: not with a bang, but with a zookeeper, murmuring, "Oh, crap."